Today

So i finally got to sleep around 3ish i think and woke up around 12:30ish.  I had to meet up with my caseworker today. She's been on vacation for 2 weeks and when the last time we met i was a pretty bad time. Just lost and hopeless and numb. Not a great feeling at all. I was really debating what i really wanted. Life or Death. I'm still here so it looks like i picked the right one. Anyways so we just caught up on what was going on in the past couple of weeks.

Since i will not be working that much i have to try to keep busy or i will put myself back in a hole. I attempted to clean and organize my room tonight and that when really wrong. I went from cleaning and organizing to looking for my passport and really fucking up my room. So it now looks like a bomb went off in my room. It's hard to keep focus lately and it sucks. I just hope my new medication really help me. Only time will tell though.......